Happy Valentine’s Day!
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Monthly Archives: February 2014
Can I eat my kids yet?
“DON’T GO PEE OUT THERE NAKED. Squid, you don’t go pee naked. Everyone see you. what you were thinking ’bout, peeing in the front yard?”
“Nuthin’. I just pee. DragonMonkey, Let me in.”
**************
“Boys, your mom is out running errands. I’ll be watching you while she’s gone. You can play with any of my sons’ toys that you want, but all I ask is that you pick them up when you’re done. Understand, Dragonmonkey?
“Yes, Mrs. D.”
“Squid?”
“Yes, Mrs. D.”
“Okay have fun.”
“Boys – I need you to clean this up. You’ve scattered toys all over the hall, and in the living room. Come put them away.”
“Yes, Mrs. D.”
“Yes, Mrs. D.”
“DragonMonkey, Squid, both of you come here, right now. Look what you did – when I said you needed to put the toys away, I meant you needed to actually put them away, not just throw them in my son’s room and shut the door. Do you understand?”
“Yes. I sowwy, Mrs. D.”
“That’s fine, Squid. Thank you for apologizing. Just clean them up and you’ll be fine…. DragonMonkey?”
“…….”
“DragonMonkey?”
“…….”
“DragonMonkey, you can either answer me and go clean up those toys, or you can go on the timeout chair.”
“Awww, shit. SHIT. Fine, Mrs. D.”
*****
At five and three years old, they’re probably too big to eat, right?
