I have to be honest – horses aren’t perfect.
I know, I know, I go on and on in this blog about how much I am jonesing like a crack addict miss them slightly and would very much like to have them in my life again.
The thing is, I think I’ve been painting a rather lopsided picture of owning a horse. Since I don’t want anybody out there to get an inaccurate picture of what owning a horse is all about, I have come up with a comprehensive list of why horses sometimes suck.
Brace yourself – this won’t make for easy reading.
- Alfalfa down your bra on a sweaty day
- Digging out “the pee spot”
- The way your boots never smell the same after digging out “the pee spot”
- Mucking out stalls after a rain and how an inch of water from the sky translates into manure that has the same basic weight and density as Osmium
- The cost
- Poky boogers created by dust and alfalfa that stab the inside of your nostrils
- The way horses ONLY sneeze on your clean shirt when you are sneaking by for a quick scratch before going to work
- The way they always pass gas whenever you clean their back hooves
- updated after Lyatha reminded me I forgot one of the worst parts: The way they’ll take a big drink of water or a big bite of wet food riiiiiight before lovingly resting their chin on your shoulder… and dribbling it down the neck of your shirt.
That’s about all I can think of. I’m sorry I had to do that – I know it was tough to read, but I did think it was time for a little honesty on this blog.
Sometimes horses are just awful…. just so, so awful.
