Monthly Archives: July 2011

We really are horrible parents.

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7

It’s all my fault.

It really is.

I mean, if it weren’t for us, the DragonMonkey probably would have loooooooved monkeys.

But then we went and scarred him for life..

Every night we have to convince him – YET AGAIN – that no.

No.

NO.

No, there are no herds of monkeys living in our absurdly tiny backyard. The ficus trees that line the wall do NOT contain hoards of evil, flesh-biting monkeys or angry, volatile gorillas.

The trees are full of leaves. And sticks. And probably a couple of birds or bugs.

There are NO monkeys.

It takes awhile to convince him of this, but eventually it sinks in.

Until the next night.

And the next.

And the next.

Wake up Call

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11

Dude.

I’m too fat for my saddle.

No, I’m being serious.

I’m. Too. FAT. For. My. Saddle.

I can fit in it, but my fleshy thighs are all squished and uncomfortable against the pommel and it shoves me forward and throws my center of balance off.

I caught myself logging onto Craigslist to browse through the Farm & Garden section and looking to see how much a used 16″ might go for since my 15″ saddle no longer fits.

Then I paused and gave it some thought….. REALLY, Becky? REALLY? Could I get any lazier or stereotypically American?

So, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to bed. I have to get up early in the morning, pack my salad and go for a run.

Because, SERIOUSLY. I out-fatted my saddle.

🙁